Meet Amber, aka: Princepessa, Little Mother and/or Sarge

Remember back awhile ago that I said that I wanted to interview different bloggers and then post the interviews here? Well, here is my first one. I didn’t realize that it would be such a hit and I really want to do a good job with questions that are appropriate and relative to the blogger that I am interviewing, so it is taking me awhile to research each blogger and come up with interesting, thought provoking, meaningful questions. Be patient with me. There won’t be any rhyme or reason as to when they are posted, but I am going to go in order of who volunteered first and so on.

My first interview was of Amber from Life of an Everyday Princess. Here is what she said to me before answering my questions:

Thank you so much for interviewing me! I almost feel like a celebrity or something. And I apologize for how long the answers are. Your questions just really made me think! Feel free to edit whatever you may need to, though. Again, thanks, Shelli!

I did edit them down, which was hard because it was all good, but only because I wanted people to read them all and get what I thought was the most important part of the answer. I didn’t want people to say, “oh this is too long, I am not going to read the whole thing” because then they would miss out on the wonder that is you. This means that if your name isn’t Amber or any of the above aliases, you better read the whole interview and submit a 5 page report on it to me so that I know you read the whole thing.

Here we go…

First of all, how old are you?

Technically, I’m 22 but my birthday is right around the corner; the 25th of this upcoming month, so I’ll be turning another year older before I can blink.

You say that your favorite color is pink, but your template is brown and blue and green. Those seem like total opposites. What made you choose that template with those colors?

To be honest, I don’t know anything about HTML so I had to go shopping in the pre-made templates. I thought the template I have was pretty, so I chose it. But every so often, I get bored and have to “go shopping” again. Thank God for the Computer Smart Ones.

What do you want to be when you grow up? (I’m not grown up yet and I am a lot older than you. ) Maybe it is many things. Tell me what they are and a brief explanation of why you want to do those things.

What I really want to do and what I’m planning on going back to school to do, is be an RN. Once I get my Nursing license, I plan on staying somewhere for a couple of years to get some solid experience as a nurse, then start traveling. It has always been my dream, since I was a little girl, to go to foreign countries and help people. There are so many areas of pain, death, destruction, and so on in this world… really, just pick a spot and GO! Make a difference.

I would also like to write someday; I’ve been blogging for about three years now and it really gives me a big thrill when I know that someone has read what I’ve written, even if it is crap, haha. I want to write something that is going to open a person’s heart to the suffering in the world and inspire them to do something about it as well. It’s a one person at a time thing, you know?

In your young life, you have gone through a lot, probably more than most people your age. What is the one thing that has most affected you and why?

Well, I’d have to say the year I was a Freshman in high school was definitely a life-changing time in our family history and my life. Having a brother who was suffering from mental illness, bouncing from mental hospital to mental hospital all over the state and having to go there to visit him every weekend, wherever he was at at the time. Caring for my Mom who fell into a deep depression between Matt’s illness and her own complete hysterectomy. There was a lot of responsibility on my shoulders – some of it I assumed on my own, some of it was thrust there by life’s circumstances. I tried to be there for my Dad and we had many talks late at night where we would pour our hearts out and I got very close to my Dad during that time period. My “mothering instincts” were fine-tuned during this time because of my little sister. I was pretty much the one taking care of her since my Dad had to work 15 and 16 hour days back then and my Mom was… crippled with depression. She actually ended up moving out for a few months (which turned out to be a good thing as it jump started her out of the pit she had been in). I can say looking back now that it was a very difficult thing to go through at the time, but it certainly isn’t “rare” and people all around the world go through much worse every single day. I was one of the lucky ones because things did get better, my family did heal, my parents have an amazing marriage, and so on. Plus, it really helped shape me into the person I am today. I’ve never really out-grown being a “Little Mother” or “Sarge” as my family calls me. Going through all that… you see a bigger picture and gain a lot of compassion for other people. I guess what I’m saying is that it did affect me, but not all in a negative manner.

I have done some research on your site and I saw where you said that your biological clock is ticking, but I may have missed where you talk about whether you want to marry and have a family. Is this something that you want out of life? BTW, you still have lots of time.

Most definitely! I want the whole package someday. I guess my biological clock screams at me more than the “hurry up and get married clock” because I’m around so many more happy babies, than truly happy relationships. I’ve mentioned my parent’s marriage before and it truly is an example of what love and marriage should be like. They are one in a million, but I’m not settling for anything less than what they have for myself. I may whine a lot about that stupid clock, but honestly, I know that right now – I am NOT equipped in any way, shape, or form, to have a child. And I really would prefer it to be in the proper order. I guess I’m just a bit old-fashioned like that.

What is the one most important thing that you learned from having a brother with severe mental illness? What lessons have you learned since his death?

To love with all your heart and be compassionate toward everyone. The only thing people see when you look at others is the cover page of a book. You have no idea what is written in the hidden chapters of their life…Matt once told me that I had no idea what it was like to get up every day, put a smile on my face, and go to school knowing what was waiting. There were a lot of people who loved Matt because he would do anything for a laugh and he was loyal to a fault. There were also a lot of ignorant people who knew about his problems (we live in a small town) and they went out of their way to try and make his life a living hell. Matt always carried on and kept being himself no matter what, but it still hurt him. I had been ragging on him about wanting to drop out of school when he said that and although he had been sick for several years then, it was the first time that I got a look at his HEART. Without meaning to, I had been being one of those ignorant people. It was a slap in the face and an eye-opening moment for sure.

I’ve learned a lot since Matt died. About accepting those you love – the good and the bad, no holds barred. You may not always like the things they do or say, but you don’t hold your expectation of them above their head and try to force them to jump to meet it. I’ve learned to trust your instincts and if you have a “bad” feeling, it doesn’t hurt anything to send up a prayer and ask God to keep your family safe as they go about their day. I’ve learned to not hold grudges and so many things that used to be cause for major drama are just…petty now. Of course, I’m not perfect and sometimes you don’t always practice the lessons you’ve learned, but they still stick with you.

Finally, something more fun…

What qualities, physical or otherwise, are you looking for in a life partner?

My Dad set the bar high – he is a shining example of what a man should be and how he should treat his wife. I refuse to settle; there are some things you shouldn’t compromise on. I just wanted to clear that up before I answered your question :).

I want a man with a strong spine and a soft, romantic, heart. Someone who has kindness and compassion for others, intelligence, and a sense of humor. I am not a completely shallow person, but I will say that he has to be attractive TO ME. That doesn’t mean to Hollywood’s standards or whatever. But you have to have chemistry with the person you’re going to spend forever with. Phil, from Sheepdip, once gave the best explanation I’ve ever heard: “They have to excite me mentally, emotionally, physically, and spiritually. That about sums it up?

What would your ideal vacation be? For example, where would you go, who would be with you, what would you do?

Oye. This is a tough one because there are so many special people in my life and I enjoy doing different things with different people…

If I were to go on vacation by myself, I would choose a cottage on the bluffs overlooking the ocean in Ireland. A quiet, peaceful, get-away where I could write, take long walks exploring the countryside, mingle with the locals at a pub, and see the ocean from my bedroom window.

If I were with Teresa [her best friend], we’d go to Europe to all the different castles and historical landmarks. The scenes where many romance writers have set their stories. We would sample the various cuisines that has made each country famous and take a million photographs. And flirt with as many men as possible!

If it were with my sister, Ashley, we’d probably go somewhere in Mexico where she could drink as well. We’d lay out on the beach, drinking margaritas, while a couple of cabana boys fanned us with giant palm leaves. We’d laugh and talk. There would be no hard feelings or mention of a turbulent past… just two sisters, on vacation, getting to know one another as adults without prejudice. I would also surprise her with a pass to swim with the dolphins as she LOVES dolphins and has always wanted to do that.

If I were to vacation with my parents, we would go to the Holy Lands and explore the sacred ground there. Be every bit the fascinated tourists and soak it all in together. Or we could go to Hawaii on a family vacation and take a helicopter ride over the volcanoes. Either/or would work! I could picture all of us in sandals and native dress, taking pictures, and ooh’ing and ahh’ing as we shared the pictures our imagination were conjuring.

This kid is amazing, no? I call her a kid, but she is really an adult, and I don’t mean it to be degrading. I just remember what it was like to be her age. I think that wonderful things are going to happen to her and from her. Don’t lose your optimistic, philanthropic nature, Amber. And travel, join a missionary or the Red Cross or whatever now! You will only be young and unencumbered by responsibility once.